A few years ago, Cole Harry found himself in the midst of a nasty, brutish, and sudden divorce. His now-ex-husband left him for a Greek poet, kept the nice Brooklyn apartment, all the furniture, and the mutual friends. Harry was left floundering for a place to live. Instead of fighting, he walked away, seeking a fresh start in the Bay Area.
It was in the midst of that chaos that he realized his ex had taken yet one more thing from him: his Rancho Gordo Bean Club subscription. Harry had received it as a birthday gift from his ex, but he’d never thought to transfer it to his own name. “The man never cooked a pot of beans in his life, but he enjoyed my beans,” he tells me.
Harry reached out to his ex to ask for the membership transfer but was quickly blocked. “I had a two-day freak-out about it. I mean, related to everything, but Bean Club was really the straw that broke the camel's back,” he says.
Even if the principle of the matter wasn’t such a big deal to Harry, the thought of buying his own membership felt daunting: At the time (and even now), the illustrious Bean Club boasted an enormous waiting list of heirloom legume hopefuls. According to Rancho Gordo, the list currently has 33,725 names on it. He emailed the company, begging to have the beans transferred to him, but no dice. It was never his account, so there was legally nothing they could do.
“We do get a lot of these emails regarding divorces. Sometimes they provide too much information in trying to make their cases on who should keep it,” a Rancho Gordo representative wrote in response to my inquiry.
But what about the spirit of it all? How could an aggrieved party prove that they were the one who deserved the food club membership? To that end, I asked a few fancy food club purveyors in the Bay to play King Solomon for a day and adjudicate the issue.
Dario Barbone, owner of San Francisco’s Alimentari Aurora and curator of the monthly Aurora Fish Tin XOXO club: “I would have to make a pescatarian test on the spot. A true fish lover would know the difference between alici and sardines — or if squid counts as shellfish. Fish literacy has to be the first step! But diamonds are forever and fish tins are too. They won’t go bad: They’re meant to be aged anyway.”
Carolyn King, spice maven at Burlap & Barrel: “I think my brief stint in child welfare might be helpful here. It's important to focus on the emotional interest of the beans. A full assessment of the stew pots and spices of each parent should be considered. Attention must be paid to whether the beans have access to adequate resources, stability, and the least disruption possible. Which mail carrier offers the best service in each parent's neighborhood? Will the beans be safe sitting on the porch alone for long lengths of time? This is important.”
Katie Reicher, chef at San Francisco’s Greens, which has a sold-out monthly supper club: “I would say the membership should go to the person who initiated it, unless it was intended as a gift to the other person. Or, if it was gifted to the couple by, say, partner A's parents/family/BFF, it should go to partner A. That sort of feels like a way to define ownership to me. If it's not that clear, possibly it should go to the cook in the family?
In a much more Judge Judy sense — if it's a toss-up of who deserves the beans, perhaps they enter a chili cook-off to determine the winner. I, for one, would gladly take on that challenge and would concede my beans if I lost. And at least I got chili out of the whole ordeal.”
Mona Leena-Michael, chef and owner of Lulu’s Little Kitchen in Albany: “Speaking as a newly divorced person, I’d say the membership belongs to whoever had the foresight to sign up in the first place. If they can’t agree to share it, then it should go to the person whose name is on the account — especially if they’ve kept separate finances and it’s been paid for from their account all along.
That said… it’s beans. 😂 If this is the hill your divorce is dying on, maybe it’s time to take a deep breath, head to Berkeley Bowl, buy some Rancho Gordo beans off the shelf, and start your next chapter.”
So what happened to Cole Harry and his quest for heirloom beans? While Rancho Gordo couldn’t take beans away from his ex, they did the next best thing and let him buy his own subscription.
Soleil Ho is a cultural critic, cookbook writer, and food journalist who has a nasty habit of founding media projects instead of going to therapy: from the feminist literary magazine Quaint to food podcast Racist Sandwich to our dear COYOTE.
