COYOTE Calendar: March 5-11

Welcome to the COYOTE Calendar. Here are this week's hand-picked events, just for you. 

We're hella close to spring springing again (what even is "time" anymore?), which means more sunshine and patio drinking is right around the corner. Flowers are abloom (inside museum galleries). A themed restaurant week beckons (served with a side of basmati rice). And everything from dragon-clad parades to dog-costumed Paw Patrolling awaits. This week, we’ve got all that — plus dark tales about Vallejo's nefarious history, jazzy renditions of A Tribe Called Quest, and queer line dancing for beginners.

Trust me, I know it's easy to take living in the Bay Area for granted. But if you're already paying the eye-gouging cost of rent to be here, you might as well get the most out of it — even if that means painting miniature rocks with strangers in San Francisco on a random weeknight.

Go forth and enjoy!

• After Dark: Wondrous Fungus 〰 What is it about the Bay Area and fungi? Here at COYOTE, we've already supplied ample fungi-related happenings (greenhouse raves; glowing fungi strolls through the forest; a Russian River Fungi Fest; and so forth). Whatever the fixation, we've got another evening of "spores, stalks, and species galore" for you: this time on the Pier. 〰 6-10pm 〰 $22.95 〰 Exploratorium, SF 〰 more info
• Second-Ever Indian Restaurant Week 〰 San Francisco is currently hosting the nation's only Indian-dedicated restaurant week. Cycle your way through the aromatic offerings of six spots around SF, including TIYA, New Delhi Restaurant, and Rooh. Expect elevated takes and pre-fixe menus that feature tandoori avocado, shisho chaat made with potato tikki, ragda mousse and raspberry, and samosa cornetto with tamarind gel. 〰 Varies by location 〰 Varies by meal 〰 San Francisco 〰 more info
• Bouquet to Art 〰 For its 42nd edition, the de Young Museum will again host a week of floral bouquets, art, and food trucks to honor its permanent collection. Unique flower arrangements are paired with different artworks for an evening of pinkies-up appreciation. Proceeds will go to arts education and conservation projects. 〰 6-9pm 〰 $44 〰 de Young Museum, SF 〰 more info

• Vallejo Unhinged 〰 Did you know Vallejo has its own museum, appropriately known as the Vallejo Museum? For this after hours hang, listen to a local historian who will explore "the city's darker history" by excavating its crimes, hauntings, conspiracies, scandals – over drinks. 〰 21+. 〰 7–9pm 〰 $25-30 〰 Vallejo Museum, Vallejo 〰 more info
• 'Sound Bites' at Public Market Emeryville 〰 The Bay Area has no shortage of live music and hella good food. 'Sound Bites' combines them both. Pull up to the food hall in Emeryville, where you can grub at Ramen Hiroshi, Pig In A Pickle, or Paradita Eatery while listening to this week's musical guest, DJ and multi-instrumentalist Chaz Gunther. 〰 6–9pm 〰 FREE 〰 Public Market, Emeryville 〰 more info
• John Malkovich trashes famous classical music 〰 In an original show scripted by violinist Aleksey Igudesman, the mystical John Malkovich hops on stage as a faux critic for "The Music Critic." This comedy-slash-music shindig provides "a compilation of some of the greatest-but-most-controversial, critically-lambasted-but-hugely-acclaimed-by-audiences orchestral works from around the world and from throughout musical history." Take note, symphonic friends: this is a one-night-only performance. 〰 7:30pm 〰 $75 〰 Davies Symphony Hall, SF 〰 more info
• Alfred Hitchcock's The 39 Steps on a live stage 〰 For the film buffs among us, Hitchcock's 1935 British spy thriller mystery will be reimagined as a "fast-paced, hilarious stage adventure" for a contemporary East Bay audience. The show (which features four actors playing over 100 characters) will run every weekend until the end of March, but debuts on this night. 〰 7pm 〰 $37 〰 Village Theater, Danville 〰 more info

• Chinese New Year Parade 〰 Have you really lived in the Bay if you've never attended Chinatown's New Year Parade in the city? Purchase bleacher seats in advance, or wade through the masses to catch the start of the dragon-dancing festivities, which begin on Second and Market Streets. 〰 5pm 〰 FREE 〰 Union Square to Columbus Ave., SF 〰 more info
• Paw Patrol Live 〰 This one is for the parents with toddlers out there, thugging it out and, against the laws of human physics, juggling nap times, diaper changes, and crumb-ridden meals. Paw Patrol Live – the rescue dog cartoon extravaganza — is coming to town to temporarily relieve you of your entertainment duties. Godspeed. 〰 10am and 2pm 〰 $48 〰 San Jose Civic, SJ 〰 more info
• Monetized Happiness, A Poetry Reading 〰 Join poets Keith Gaboury, J.R. Rice, Esperanza Cabrales and others, for a night of provocative readings from Monetized Happiness, a "poetry collection that shows economic disparity, homelessness, parenthood, and urban living in Oakland and San Francisco. American happiness is monetized. When people sleep on sidewalks and others sleep under roofs, are we living in an equal country?" 〰 5–6:30pm 〰 FREE 〰 Nomadic Bookshop, Oakland 〰 more info
• ¡Desmadre! Hip-Hop Vs. Reggaeton Patio Takeover 〰 Reggaeton. Cumbia. Dembow. Perreo. Corridos. This is officially Oakland's best party venue, straight up. 〰 10pm 〰 $10 〰 Crybaby, Oakland 〰 more info

• A Tribe Called Quest, But Make It Jazz 〰 Oakland's Grammy-nominated musician, instrumentalist, rapper, producer, and composer Kev Choice "honors the enduring cross-genre impact and legacy of A Tribe Called Quest’s landmark 1993 hip-hop masterpiece, 'Midnight Marauders'." He'll be performing songs from the album, as well as his own original music, at the Joe Henderson Lab. Tap in. 〰 7:30pm 〰 $48 〰 SFJAZZ Center, SF 〰 more info
• Queer Line Dancing for Beginners 〰 Established in 2025, SCUFF brings a variety of queer-friendly country dancing to the Yay. For this hoedown, dust your boots off and learn the basics of line dancing. 〰 5:30-7:30pm 〰 $20 〰 Bandaloop, Oakland 〰 more info
• Stories in Bloom (aka Visit A Mansion) 〰 If you've never been to the historic Filoli house and garden in Woodside, this is your fucking wake up call. It's a European chateau tucked into the hillsides off Highway 280, about a half hour drive south from SF. For this event, Xuebing Du will be presenting her photography book and exploring issues of identity, home, and flowers... but honestly, a walk around the garden is worth the drive alone. 〰 2-3pm 〰 FREE 〰 Filoli, Woodside 〰 more info

• Build Shit! 〰 There's no real MVP like our local libraries. For real. Albany's will be hosting 3D printer demonstrations, and supplying all the LEGO, Duplo, Straw Connectors, buttons, and other miscellaneous materials needed to build shit for fun. Inner kid mode unlocked; shout out Myles Turner. 〰 3:30-5pm 〰 FREE 〰 Edith Stone Room at Albany Public Library, Albany 〰 more info
• Game Developer Tells Stories, Comedians Re-Interpret Them 〰 "Game for a Laugh" invites a real-life game developer to tell true stories about his work life (honestly thrilling, I'm sure), which will then be used as improv fodder for live comedians. Fucking genius concept. 〰 7-8pm 〰 $25 〰 Electric Box Theater, SF 〰 more info

• "Mezcal and Mole" Comedy Night 〰 Our big revelation while putting this calendar together?? There are so many damn comedy nights in the Bay! (Honorable mention: SF's "Laugh GPT" AI-Powered Comedy Night... lol.) We're truly spoiled. For our selection, though, we're going with the mezcal and mole rendition inside a Oaxacan kitchen in Oakland's Temescal, as part of the "HellaFunny" comedy program. 〰 7-9pm 〰 Varies 〰 Mesa Maguey, Oakland 〰 more info
• The Science and Psychology of Muppet Design 〰 For this locally-curated "Lectures on Tap" series (in which a roving group of professors, historians, and experts take over bars to impart sagely, beer-soaked wisdom), the award-winning Muppet Maker Michael Schupbach will be on hand to pull back the proverbial curtain on muppetry. Head's up: you gotta contact the group in advance and they'll email you the location ahead of time. 〰 6:30-8:30pm 〰 $39 〰 North Beach, SF 〰 more info
• $1 Margaritas on "Disco Taco Tuesday"!?!!? 〰 For a full half hour, you can purchase margaritas for $1USD. Yes, there will be tacos. And disco. Thank us later. 〰 7:30-8pm 〰 Varies 〰 Underdogs Cantina, SF 〰 more info
• San Francisco Botanical Garden's Free Day of the Month 〰 In the year of our lord 2026, we're all hurting for funds. Cut spending where you can, and hit up Golden Gate Park on the second Tuesday of every month to access the Botanical Garden for free, all-day long (the gardens are free to visit daily, but only between 7-9:30am for the early birders). Final entry is at 4pm. 〰 10am-4:30pm 〰 FREE 〰 Botanical Garden, SF 〰 more info
• $6 Drive-In Movie Night ! 〰 For a COVID-safe outing, hop in your whip and pull into one of two drive-in theaters across the Bay to watch a movie while waving at your fam, homies, or all of the above, sitting in the parked cars beside you. 〰 $6+ 〰 Capitol Drive-In, SJ or Solano Drive-In, Concord 〰 more info

• Cookbook Debut with Maxine Sharf 〰 Maxine Sharf, the Orinda-raised social media star who COYOTE recently profiled, will be flying back into town to debut her cookbook for Bay Area foodies. She will be accompanied by her mom, who sweetly appears in just about all of Sharf's online cooking videos. 〰 7-8:30pm 〰 $42 〰 Jewish Community Center, SF 〰 more info
• Brazilian BBQ, Comedy, and Cocktails 〰 Chef Henrik will be posted up dishing out Brazilian BBQ at The Factory Bar in Richmond — arguably the best bar in the city, offering whiskey and rum flights — beginning at 3pm, and will be followed by a local cast of stand up comedians to close out the night of punchlines. (Bonus sidequest: if you aren't filled up with Brazilian BBQ by the end of it all, Tacos El Tucan is next door and serves hella good Tijuana-style bites). 〰 3-10pm 〰 Varies 〰 The Factory Bar, Richmond 〰 more info
• All Elite Wrestling: Dynamite & Collision 〰 "What will happen when the best wrestlers in the world face off?" That's what a corny made-for-TV voice asks as a montage of pro wrestlers you've never heard of throwdown WWE-style (except, technically, this is AEW-style) in the lead-up to this national wrestling event. Most of us probably haven't watched wrestling since middle school, but for this price, it wouldn't take much arm-twisting to get me back in the seat for a night. 〰 4:30pm 〰 $20 〰 San Jose Civic, SJ 〰 more info
• Mini Rock Painting Workshop 〰 One sentence: painting miniature rocks with strangers. 〰 2-4pm 〰 FREE 〰 YBCA, SF 〰 more info